Archive for November, 2009|Monthly archive page

When is the Woman’s Restroom not the Woman’s Restroom….

….when it’s the MEN’S ROOM!!

I was getting ready to jet off to Baltimore, MD and Buffalo, NY last Thursday for what I now can say were two of the greatest concerts I have ever seen (more on that later, when I come back down to earth), and had just finished lunch. I figured I’d do my regular pre-flight ritual: grab a magazine, some bottled water and then hit the ladies room prior to getting the cattle call to board the flight.

Magazine, check. Water, check. Potty break….well, uh, check. Sorta.

It’s funny, often our minds will play tricks on us, but usually it’s bang on with its assessment of things. I walk into the restroom, it’s kind of long and narrow, and the first thing I noticed were the stalls. I think to myself, “hmmm, there aren’t that many stalls in here, that’s unusual” but I keep walking. I then noticed what appeared to be sinks to my left. Again, brain is really trying to tell me something with the thought “uhhh, those sinks are awfully low…” – OMFG!!! Brain fully engaged now. “Those aren’t sinks, you dummy, THEY’RE URINALS!!”

😯

Talk about being *completely* unaware of your surroundings.

Eyes go wide, face goes red and it’s only then that I see men, several men. “Can I help you honey?” one of them asks laughingly. “Uh….no” I reply…all the while doing a complete 180 and hoping upon hope that my legs don’t fail me. All I could think of saying after that was (yelling it even), “I’M SORRY!” and laughing. Not tittering, not chuckling or giggling, but a full on, slap yourself on the ass, belly laugh!

With the sound of men’s laughter trailing behind me, I managed to get out of there without further incident; well ok, so I passed a guy coming in as I was going out, but honestly, it was a blur. He could have been Brad Pitt or Bruce Springsteen for all I knew (well ok, except I knew that Springsteen was gonna be in Baltimore). I immediately went into the ladies room, found an empty stall (happy to see *several* stalls) and proceeded to laugh my ass off. I must have sat there for a good ten minutes before I thought it was *safe*. Safe from what, I’m not sure since the embarrassment had already been experienced. Composed finally, I left the ladies room heading towards my gate hoping that none of those guys were Springsteen fans heading to Baltimore. 😆

At least I didn’t “point and laugh”.

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It’s Not the Swine Flu!

I don’t know how many times I’ve said that in the last two weeks.

Sigh…..two weeks with this creeping crud and I’m about ready to rip it out of my chest and wrestle it to the frickin ground. As it is, I’ve hacked up at least one lung already…uh, sorry for the mess. Clean up in aisle 3!

But seriously, it is getting better, really. It’s just taking it’s sweet, sweet time. Went to a clinic, but they were booked up solid, so I went and talked to a pharmacist, who recommended XYZ brand of cough syrup. Ended up getting “the warming sensation” kind – I said cough syrup, not LUBE!! – but damn if it doesn’t feel all warm and tingly inside. I’d prefer that it get rid of my cough, but hey I guess we can’t have everything.

When you’re sick during a time when people are worried about the H1N1 Flu (aka Swine Flu), it’s remarkable the looks you get when you cough in public. I’ve never been much of a germaphobe, but hell, even I don’t want to sit next to me on the bus. 😉